Looking Inward vs Denying Oneself

Then Jesus said to His disciples, "If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross and follow Me." - Matthew 16:24

"Looking Inward", "self-reflection", "know thyself (Ancient Greek idea)", "finding yourself", "inner peace".  There are a variety of ways to describe what is essentially a pagan/eastern/Buddhist philosophy.  

The new-age self-help "gurus" (Hindu teacher) are constantly imploring us to find happiness and fulfillment through by thinking more about ourselves.  The teaching is that in order to better love others we must first learn to love ourselves comes directly from new age philosophy.  

I have written about this idea before (Link: 3 Ways to Test Your Motives)(Link: Following Your Heart).  But the discussion begs the question what are some practical ways we can see the truth about ourselves?

1. Examine yourself with the Truth - trying to examine ourselves objectively is nearly impossible without a frame of reference.  The Bible is that mirror that shows us who we truly are (James 1:22-24), that can judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart (Hebrews 4:12).  You will never grow in holiness without reading the Word. 
2. Ask for feedback - Grab a true friend, or your wife, and ask them for honest feedback about what your weaknesses are and how you can serve others better.  
3. Walk in the Light with other believers - 1 John 1:7 is an important verse for understanding true fellowship.  We NEED other believers to give us honest, loving feedback about our actions and to encourage us to do obey the Lord.  This means being vulnerable with our spouses, christian brothers and sisters, and even our children.  Ask yourself: When was the last time I asked someone for forgiveness? 
4. Deny Yourself often and learn from it - the goal is to grow in holiness, to become more like Christ and grow closer to Him.  How?  By denying ourselves and serving others.  We will never find the motive to do this within ourselves, we can only deny ourselves through the Holy Spirit.  The more you deny yourself and give to others the more the Holy Spirit empowers you to keep giving.  But beware! The flesh will fight you every step of the way.