Singles - Marriage won't solve the problem

If I just...

This is one of the statements that get people in trouble.

If I just get enough money.
If I just pray the right prayer.
If I just find the right person.

As humans we seem predisposed to the idea that there is a magic bullet that will solve all our problems.  Often time for the sex addict the magic bullet is often marriage.  "If I was just married my issues with lust will disappear."  The implication of this statement is that sexual immorality is only an expression of loneliness and once companionship is found the problem will be solved.

Unfortunately this isn't the case.  In fact, what will happen is the sex addict focuses his or her lust onto their spouse.  The results aren't pretty:

• Real love is pushed aside in favor of aggressive and selfish sexual acting as one partner attempts to live out their fantasies to the detriment of their spouse.
• Frustration and anger result when reality doesn't match the perverted imagination of the sex addict. 
• The other spouse rightfully feels pressured and used leading to a relationship that is strained and dysfunctional.
• The patterns created as a single person inevitably make their way back into the (now) married persons life as they seek to satiate their lust.
• Secretative behavior and lies build up to hide the betrayal.  Often times they will pretend they are hiding the behavior in order to protect their spouse.
• The intended sexual relationship between the husband and wife inevitably suffers because of the rift created by the addict's behavior.  This can include Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction (yes it is a thing), constant masturbation, and seeking sexual experiences outside of home.

Bringing a serious addiction into a marriage is a recipe for disaster.  In fact I believe that fathers should be making sure their daughters aren't marrying into such a situation.  As I have said before, pornography threatens our entire culture, our marriages, our families and our churches.  Start fighting lust before you get married, and if need be put off marriage until you deal with the lust.